TLAM by Brittany Salaam

I always thought I would be a member of a historically African-American sorority. I had my heart set on one thing all my life and had to intentions of changing my mind… But there was something about Kappa Alpha Theta. My mom and sister worried if I would really fit in and if I would be received in a loving manner and I love them for that. But I am happy, blessed, and proud to be able to say that I am a sister of Kappa Alpha Theta and truly feel like one. Theta for me is belonging. It means a chance to thrive in a group for a common purpose. It means that I have the opportunity to really get to know a fine group of women and share my diversity and welcome the diversity of others. It is a place where I am not a minority but I am an important part of an awesome majority…a whole. I love Kappa Alpha Theta already for everything it is and everything that it already means to me and I can only hope, and I sincerely have faith, that my love strengthens…because after all, faith hope and love are all important, but the greatest of these is love.

Faith, Hope, and Love. But the Greatest of These is Love. -Cristina Ciaravalli

Before joining Kappa Alpha Theta, my favorite activities were serving as a Resident Adviser and being a Wake Forest Cheerleader. I was proud to wear my apparel from Residence Life & Housing and it was cool to get free Nike clothing; however, I still felt like I needed more out of my college experience. I had started these two positions because I was told, “Res Life is such a great community” and “the cheerleaders are great teammates.” While both of those statements were true, I was still missing something. I was missing sisterhood.

Being a Kappa Alpha Theta, I have learned why we are not just members, but we are truly sisters. Everyone Theta at Wake Forest joined this organization knowing that it wouldn’t be easy, but like Joni said, “It would be worth it.” We are united in the fact that we are bold and courageous young women, and I couldn’t be prouder to associate myself with such adventurous pioneers. While we have only been in Theta a short time, I have already seen the sisterhood impacting me in ways I never thought imaginable. Thetas lift each other up when they are down. Thetas reach out to others to start new relationships. Thetas serve the community and world as a whole. Thetas surround each other with those who will lift us higher. And we don’t just wear the shirts that say we do it—but we actually do it.

Kappa Alpha Theta Fraternity prides itself on being an organization that encompasses the ideals of scholarship, leadership, friendship, service, and personal excellence. While that all sounds really impressive on paper, I wasn’t initially convinced that sororities always translate their values into their lifestyles. I knew many other organizations that claimed to hold certain values yet would act in a contradictory manner. Theta instantly debunked that myth. From the minute I met Joni and Alyssa in Benson to the dinner I just had with my little in the pit—it’s clear—Thetas stand behind our principles and we take them to heart. We have faith in each other, we never lose hope, and most importantly, we love each other dearly.

Thank you for letting me be a part of the Theta love. It has truly been an incredible experience and this organization means more to me than you will know. While I still enjoy cheer and RA, it has been the Theta committee meetings, Theta philanthropy events, Theta sisterhood, and even Theta colony meetings that were the highlights of this semester. During busy weeks of schoolwork that seemed like they would never end, I found myself highlighting any sort of Theta event in my planner as the “light at the end of the tunnel.” Theta has been just that—a light. Each sister has inspired me to be the best version of myself, to never give up, and to love unconditionally. And because of that, we have grown stronger than a team and closer than a community, and I am proud to call myself your sister. I cannot wait to continue to light up this campus with you. And when we graduate Wake Forest, we will take this love we share and light up the world. We are beautiful, talented, confident young women and I am certain these bonds will stay with us forever. After all, Theta is for a lifetime.

Making New Friends

Making Friends

I’ve never considered myself to be a social person. Until the age of 11, I couldn’t order from the cashier at McDonald’s because I was so afraid. As time went on I could talk to adults, but I was never able to easily communicate with my peers. It made me uncomfortable and anxious. The words always came out wrong. I wasn’t afraid of embarrassing myself, or that people would judge me, it was just that I couldn’t talk.

You’d think I’d be past this at 17 years of age, but I’m not. I went back to counseling this Spring. I go every other week because I have Social Anxiety. Being in crowds can give me panic attacks or make me sick if I feel uncomfortable enough. But I don’t want to be that way, so I choose not to be.

Joining Theta was something I hadn’t anticipated – ever. Sororities “weren’t my scene”. Heaven forbid I would have to…speak to people. I didn’t go through formal recruitment. But when I saw how happy my roommate was in her sorority, I questioned why it would be so awful for me to join. I mentioned my regrets to a girl on the hall, and she asked me if I wanted to try for KAT. I hadn’t heard too much talk about it before, but I had an instant gut feeling. This was my challenge. This was something good. I went through the interview, and now I’m here.

For most people, joining a sorority isn’t such a challenge. But for me to speak to girls I’ve never met on a constant basis is hard. When my mom found out I had gotten in she was so excited because she knew that it took a lot of effort on my part. And it did. I am so proud and happy that I took that step for myself. But now the real challenge begins: making friends out of my sisters.

I’ve been to Coffee with KAT four times now and I am also in the Sisterhood Committee. There are days where I stay silent and just listen, and there are days when I speak up as much as possible. The first day I went to coffee I just sat there because I was so afraid. Someone asked me my name and all eyes turned towards me. I didn’t want to go back. But my counselor and I talked about going again. She told me to sit up straight, act confident, and speak loudly. I tried going again and it worked! I’m making friends and doing so much better.

The reason that I’m quiet sometimes is certainly not because I don’t like any other Thetas. I love my sisters to death. It’s just that it’s hard some days. Tonight we learned about being a leader during New Member Meeting. And so I just ask that all of you leaders out there talk to a sister who isn’t speaking up. Ask her what she thinks, because she’s thinking a lot. She’ll appreciate that you are pushing her to be better, as well as inviting her to be your friend. Remember that it’s the little things that can make a huge difference in someone’s life.

TLAM,
Victoria

 

Being the First

 

            As the oldest child in my family, “being the first” came with each new activity I participated in. Growing up I was never excited to “be the first”—the first to go to school, the first to get braces, the first to take the SAT. I was always a bit envious of my younger siblings who would figure out the best way to do things based on my actions, triumphs, and mistakes. I wanted just one time for someone to make those mistakes before me, so that I, too, could learn from them—what the best classes were to take, clubs to join, which colleges to visit, when to take the SATs, and how to maneuver through the college application process.

            Now, however, for the first time, I am truly happy to “be the first”, to be a charter member of Kappa Alpha Theta at Wake Forest University. Perhaps it is because I am not in this venture alone, but I am walking alongside 150+ wonderful women, all of whom I am extremely proud not only to call my friends and classmates, but also my sisters. It is truly a unique opportunity that we have to establish something at Wake Forest University that will far outlast our short time spent wandering the Quad, studying in the library, or laughing with friends at the Pit.

            Under the guidance and leadership of our two wonderful, caring, and enthusiastic ELCs, I am excited to see what the first group of Kappa Alpha Thetas will accomplish over the course of the semester. What name will we create for ourselves? What traditions will we establish? Who will we be able to help through our service and philanthropic events? By holding true to the values of Bettie Locke Hamilton, we can create an organization that continues to be supportive of the leadership, academic, and social pursuits of all members, while providing a family away from home. I hope that over the course of the semester, we will be able to continue to lay the foundation of a strong sisterhood, one that is built by genuine concern and support of others.

We are the first! Wow, that is a big responsibility and can seem overwhelming at times, but we must think back to our founders. The four original Thetas--Betty Locke Hamilton, Alice Allen Brant, Bettie Tipton Lindsey, and Hannah Fitch Shaw--all of whom helped to create the first Greek letter fraternity for women. They fought to create a group in which they could find support within a male dominated campus and world. They were the first and their challenge was far greater than ours.

            I challenge each and every one of you, sisters, to find courage and confidence in the actions of those four women, for they created an organization that has far outlasted any of their wildest dreams and has inducted women who have made a difference not only on their college campuses, but in the world at large. I wish good luck to each of you! And please remember, you are never in this alone. You will never have to take the first step without knowing that 150+ of your sisters step alongside you! So, perhaps “being the first” isn’t so bad after all!

 

Your sister forever and always,

Micaela

Being the First

        Now that we're a couple of weeks into our Theta experience, I've realized something about being a charter class, and being a new member. Being the first isn't about being "the best." It's about being OUR best.

        The women of Kappa Alpha Theta don't all know each other yet. We can't be the best sisterhood until we've all taken the time to get to know one another and really care about our sisters. We can't expect be be seen as the "best" because we haven't established ourselves yet. But that's where being our best comes in.

        If each woman in this sorority worked to be the best that she could be (the best sister, the best student, the best friend, etc) it is a reflection on the sorority as a whole. And if each of us works together to better each other, then we will make Kappa Alpha Theta better. That means getting dinner with sisters before chapter, tutoring a sister in Accounting, and helping a sister work through her personal problems. It also means being respectful of our ELCs, who are working so hard to get us started out on the right foot, and honoring the traditions that have been handed down for generations. Being our best isn't going to happen over night, or even in a week. But consciously making decisions to be a better person means making Kappa Alpha Theta a better organization. And that's what this is all about. Being better.

        We have the honor of being the first, and what we do will establish how Theta is seen on campus in the years to come. I am so excited to help my sisters be better women, and I cannot wait to see how my sisters will positively impact my life.

TLAM,
Leah